I wore the mask of happiness to conceal
my sorrow.
Which false face will I wear tomorrow?

We all wear masks now and then
caught up in a scenario of mix and blend.

As if it were taboo to show oneself,
we choose to keep our feelings
hidden on a shelf.

The facade of emotions, a mystery to me
double identity — confused as can be.

Hollywood actors without the pay
going through changes from day to say.

Trying to con others with a carefree air,
losing your identity, living in despair.

So goodbye to Broadway, not my cup of tea.
I may fool you, but I can’t fool me.

Sam
from Soul Searching: an anthology of poems

I was abandoned as a child, recovering alcoholic, ex-convict, diagnosed with a bipolar disorder, and a prostate cancer survivor. My past was an emotional roller coaster and I experienced mental abuse at a young age.

Today, I’ve been clean and sober for six years. I have a sponsor, solid support system and live life “one day at a time.”

I’m a college graduate and am giving back to society through community service and motivational speaking. I’m happy to be serving on the CenterPointe board.

My Higher Power (God) gives me strength and direction. I’ve discovered life is a marathon, not a sprint.

Samuel

Amazing that I’ve found my right path. Amazing for all the gifts the universe has given me. And amazing, given my tendency to melancholy, that I do occasionally take time to be grateful.

The details of my life aren’t really important. It’s enough to say that mental illness and addiction run in my biological family and that I followed some patterns of family violence, bad coping skills, and drug use right to their bitter end.

But in the end it was a beginning. All the things I thought were terrible misfortunes were really gifts to learn and grow. I was blessed. And, with a willingness to grow – I faced my demons, forgave myself and started fresh.

CenterPointe helped me do that all those years ago. It was CenterPointe that helped me connect with Vocational Rehabilitation and finish a bachelor’s degree. I’d never be where I am today without that opportunity.

Truly, my life would have painted an entirely different picture. And, although my life today isn’t picture perfect (is anyone’s?) it’s good.

It’s safe. It’s mine. And I am grateful for every single day of it.

Your life and your life story are worth countless words. Whatever you’ve lived – you’re alive today and that is a gift you can be grateful for. Take a moment to be amazed with yourself…

Abbi

Check out our profile or website for more specifics…

We’re here in the blogosphere to tell the stories of people living with mental illness & addiction and the stories of people who work with them.

So, why are these stories important anyway?

Because people living with mental illness and addiction are just people. Just everyday people like you. They have desires. They have needs. They eat and sleep and put their pants on just like millions of people do every day.

And, the people who work in behavioral health are a dedicated bunch with a lot of grit and heart. But, both groups are occasionally misunderstood.

How do I know this?

I am a person living with a mental illness in recovery for an addiction. And, I work at CenterPointe with some other cool, caring people.

Check back to read my story and how I came to work at CenterPointe. Then check back again for someone else’s story or words from our staff about why they do what they do.

Abbi